The recession and financial crisis have put tremendous pressure on the Canadian job market even for ‘real’ born-and-bred Canadians. Of course, for immigrants, that means ever more pressure to find employment and choosing a career when even during hunky-dory times they faced such scarcity of work — their high educational and professional backgrounds notwithstanding.
I’ve compiled a list, after painstaking research (my readers expect nothing less from me) and visiting hundreds of jobs and employment boards’. Regular readers will know that my expertise in employment, and my credentials are, to say the least, impeccable.
So here I present, my recommended job list, compiled and researched, of Recession Proof Careers for Immigrants in Canada.
Job Title: Abandoned Matter and Objects Manager (AMOM)
Career Description: Available in all top corporate structures, including banks and financial institutions, not to mention government and non-governmental institutions such as public transport and civil service. The Abandoned Matter and Objects Manager is responsible for day to day operations of various relinquished, constituent substances as deposited by customers, clients, patrons and existing human resource of any organization, or general populace. A Third-World Master’s Degree in Engineering is preferred.
Please note that AMOMs are often incorrectly referred to as Garbage Collectors.
Corporate Title: Director of Corporeal Affairs (DCA)
Career Description: These are highly sought-after adventurous careers for immigrants. An adventurous spirit, a playful attitude and an outgoing personality is only the beginning for these open-spaces little adventures! Not for the faint-of-heart and body! You must be ambitious, and a superb team player. A PhD in Physical Training discipline preferred.
Please note that DCAs are often incorrectly referred to as Physical Labourers.
Corporate Title: Botanical Yield and Production Manager (BYPM)
Career Description: For those holding higher degrees in Biological sciences and related professional experience. Explore the scientific pursuit of botanical comptrolling and control specifications in varied and vast uncovered botanical facilities throughout Canada and the United States. A Masters in Biochemistry or Microbiology is preferred.
Please note that BYPMs are often incorrectly referred to as Farm Labour or Fruit Pickers.